When my youngest daughter started chasing her big dream, I noticed something almost immediately: the dream lit her up, but the steps to make it real weighed her down like a backpack full of bricks. Instead of charging ahead, she’d slip into the familiar comfort of television, numbing the anxiety of not starting.
Sound familiar? Maybe you see it in your team, your friends, or your own mirror.
Honestly, if I could bottle a “cure” for procrastination, I’d probably be sipping margaritas in the Maldives by now. But here’s the thing: even with all my certifications and training, even as a Certified High Performance Coach, Imposter Syndrome-Informed Coach, Wayfinder Coach, and Neuro Change Practitioner, I’m still in the trenches with this very human struggle every day, both in myself and the brilliant women I coach.
So, why do we procrastinate even when we know better? And more importantly, how do we start anyway?
Why We Procrastinate: It’s Not Just About Laziness
Let’s bust a myth straight out of the gate: procrastination is not about laziness.
It’s about emotional management.
It’s about the story you tell yourself when the stakes feel high.
It’s about protection, i.e. guarding yourself from failure, disappointment, or even success. (Yes, success can be terrifying, too.)
In my experience, particularly with multicultural executive women who already feel like they have to work twice as hard for half the recognition, procrastination often shows up as a secret rebellion against an impossible standard. The weight of perfectionism presses so hard that even starting feels like a setup for judgment.
And so, we hesitate.
We overthink.
We wait for the “perfect moment” (one that never comes).
The Activation Energy Trap
There’s a concept from chemistry called activation energy. It’s the initial energy needed to trigger a chemical reaction. Human behaviour works the same way.
Starting anything, a project, a conversation, a workout, requires a burst of activation energy. And when we’re emotionally loaded (stressed, fearful, overwhelmed), that energy requirement shoots through the roof.
Ever felt like opening your laptop was as hard as climbing Everest? Yep, that’s activation energy at work.
The longer we wait, the steeper the emotional climb becomes.
The Ancient Wisdom of “Just Start”
An old Latin proverb says:
“Initium est dimidium facti.”
“Once you’ve started, you’re halfway there.”
Even Horace, the Roman poet, understood this secret sauce.
Starting isn’t just the first step; it’s the magic trick that cuts the journey in half.
Whenever I feel stuck (and trust me, I do), I come back to this: Momentum beats motivation every single time.
Real-World Strategies to Lower Activation Energy
Now, let’s get practical. Here’s what I teach my clients, and what I use myself on the days I’d rather binge Netflix than write a proposal or coach a session.
1. Shrink the Task Until It Feels Ridiculous
If starting feels heavy, the task is too big. Period.
Instead of “Write the quarterly strategy plan,” tell yourself, “Open a blank document and type the title.”
If even that feels hard, tell yourself, “Just open the laptop.”
Tiny moves lead to full motion.
2. Set a 5-Minute Timer
I call it “The 5-Minute Bluff.”
Commit to doing just five minutes of the dreaded task. Most of the time, the inertia carries you beyond the timer without a second thought. And if it doesn’t? Celebrate the win anyway. You showed up. That matters.
3. Pair It with a Reward
Our brains love rewards. It’s basic wiring.
I promise myself a walk, a cup of tea, or a quick check-in with a friend after I tackle the first part of a hard task. The reward doesn’t have to be big; it just has to be meaningful to you.
4. Name the Fear
Often, procrastination masks a deeper fear:
- Fear of failing.
- Fear of being judged.
- Fear of succeeding and raising expectations.
When I coach women through this, we gently peel back the layers. First, naming the fear deflates its power. It’s like turning on the light in a dark room, you realise the “monster” is just a jacket hanging on a chair.
The Personal Reality Check
I’ll be honest: some days I still sit there, negotiating with my own brain like a hostage negotiator.
- “Just write the first sentence, Steph.”
- “Just hit ‘Start’ on the Zoom call.”
- “Just change into workout clothes, you don’t even have to work out yet!”
There’s no magic immunity after all the credentials, certifications, or accomplishments.
It’s a dance. Some days, I lead. Other days, procrastination cuts in. But I keep coming back to the floor.
The Bigger Picture: It’s Not About Winning Every Battle
If you take one thing from this today, let it be this:
Procrastination isn’t a moral failing. It’s just a signal.
It’s a call for kindness, for structure, for courage.
Not for shame.
Not for punishment.
When you can respond to procrastination with curiosity instead of criticism, you’ve already broken half the cycle.
And just like Horace said: Once you’ve started, you’re halfway there.
Imagine the Freedom
Imagine if you didn’t have to dread starting anymore.
Imagine if you trusted yourself to show up, imperfect but present.
Imagine if you built a habit of beginning.
How different could your career, your relationships, your life look?
It’s not about slaying procrastination forever. (If only!)
It’s about learning to move anyway.
Tiny steps. Brave steps. Any steps.
Starting is the first spark.
Remember, you can unleash your unique version of success.
Your Coach
Stephanie
Ready to Ignite Your SPARK?
As a Certified High Performance, Wayfinder and Imposter Syndrome Informed Coach, I’m here to support you on this transformative journey. Whether it’s in your career, health, or relationships, my coaching programs are designed to help you achieve heightened and sustained levels of performance and potential. Are you ready to embrace these inner shifts then let’s embark on this journey together!
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